I'm back! Happy new year! Blessed 2012! There is just SO much God has given me and I have taken in within the span of these 2 days I was on a "break".
First of all, in terms of health, the month of December is the epic worst of 2011. I have lost my voice today. Had beer and fish nuggets at midnight breaking into New Year. I have been a whole lot confused. I did not know where to go with my heart and mind. My body simply followed suit. I have a direction now, an appointed divine and if I should painfully add, TERRIBLY DIFFICULT direction. God is testing me this 2012. This endurance I must possess in order to 'reap the good harvest' (Galatians 6).
2012 will include a lot of brown rice, Ezekiel bread, VEGETABLES of all kinds-steamed, boiled, stir fry, raw, a great reduction in crackers, fried food (anything that affects the throat). This body is made for worship, and I have to maintain it as God would want me to. I am not a some holy-moly cow here, I am imperfect so that is why I HAVE to try harder. It's forward or no where else.
Today, I visited City Harvest Church. It was an impulse almost midnight decision to go there with my nutritionist and friend, Bibiana. We are unworthy, yet He keeps calling us to Him. I felt so spiritually nourished. So inspired by God's love for His people.
This song played during the worship. It spoke volumes to me. It hit me most at, "I choose to love just as You chose me...." how powerful is that. It is God's direction for me, to love. Even when in the face of rejection, hurt and sometimes ridicule, LOVE. Don't stop because He never did.
As I have mentioned umpteen times, my health, physical state of mind and heart is all intertwined with each other. It takes so much more to have restoration physically, emotionally and spiritually. I have my moments, of depression, of anger and hurt, hope and love. What is important is that in these moments, I remember God. The giver of life, who gives birth of dreams. The One who made me sing when people said I could never. The One who will do the work He promised. I believe that if I obey him this 2012, it will end in a very very special way for me. A tedious 12 months is will be but I will not give up.
Just as with spiritual things and matters of my heart, I will not give up on health. I still embrace a vegan lifestyle however that is not something I want to throw myself into right at this point in time. I will save the earth in my deeds of being environmentally conscious, I will save the earth in being His vessel to love.
Blessed blessed year ahead blog-o-sphere. I am going to be here this year, no more running away!
xoxo. God bless.